Marriage Isn't a Piece of Cake

So lately, I have been thinking a lot about marriages. Seems like everyone is getting married and shortly after divorced. It seems to be a popular trend among today's generation, and a scary trend that seems to be growing. Why has it become so easy for people to divorce? Have we become immoral and disconnected? Have our priorities changed as a society? Why did our grandparents seem so much happier in their marriages? I think I have a clue, but you are more than welcome to disagree. This, after all, is just an opinion based off of observation and personal experiences.
One of the reasons I believe marriages are falling apart is that it has become too easy. What do I mean by that? I mean that it has become most couples back up plan, and a lot of us enter into marriage going well if it does not work out, I can always get divorced. While this is true, this already sets a couple up for failure because when you have an argument and are angry, you will say things you do not mean. Your mind jumps for what is easy. This leads me to my next assumption.
As an adult, I like to remember the good times with my grandparents. When I look back, they always seemed happy and cuddly. They always kissed each other good-bye and good night. I remember thinking as a child that I wanted that type of relationship. I admired them, and I wanted what they had. I put almost a fairytale spin on what my grandparents' relationship was. This too set my personal relationship up for disappointment. I expected everything to be kisses and cuddles. I expected to be happy all the time, and I was let down when the arguing began. I thought this is not what marriage is. You are supposed to always be happy. I was disillusioned for a very long time until one night I thought long and hard. I thought why am I so unhappy. It is because I was trying to force marriage to be something it was not.
My grandparents fought. I did not want to remember them fighting, so for the longest time, I pushed it all to the back of my mind. In order for me to cope with the reality of marriage, I had to bring the bad memories to the forefront. I remember now one fight my grandparents had. It was a bad fight. My mom guided us upstairs as they screamed and even threw things. Is this right? Throwing things? No, but you know what, sometimes we all need to scream. It happens. We need to feel heard, and it makes us feel like we are. It helps to release hurt, and so they did. When the screams stopped, I remember creeping back downstairs, and my grandparents sat watching TV. Later that night, they kissed each other good night like they always did. Even good relationships have their problems, and I think our young generation needs to remember that.
We need to stop wanting what they put in the movies and on the television. We honestly just need to grow up. It took me a long time to accept this. I wanted to be angry and blame my husband for everything bad in our relationship, and for awhile, I did. But you know what, I got tired of being angry. I wanted to be happy and have a good relationship. You cannot do this though when all you want to do is be mad. This brings me to my final point. Why would you want to stay constantly mad at your best friend? We do marry our best friends right? You're suppose to.
When a couple enters into a union, they are marrying the person they trust more than anyone and love more than anyone else on this earth. Dictionary.com says that a best friend is “the one friend that is closest to you.” Wouldn't you want that to be the person you marry? I think so many couples rush into marriage without really getting to know a person. My husband and I did.
We thought because we were close friends that we were each other's best friend. Wrong. We were naïve. We had a lot to still learn about each other. Because we did not take the time to do so, we fought. We became scared when we realized that we did not know each other like we thought we did. Thank God, we had patience. It was hard, and at times, it was hurtful. We had created an image of the other one that was not necessarily true. Our marriage took a hard hit with this one. We did almost divorce, but thanks to the wisdom and guidance of loved ones around us, we did what we were supposed to do before we got married.
We went on dates and talked about our goals in life. It turned out that we may not have been the perfect picture that each other wanted, but we are exactly what the other needs to make our dreams come true. We learned to respect each other and love each other for what we are and what we are not. We still have our little problems, but we talk it out and sometimes even shout. It is worth it though. We both want what the other wants, and we want our daughter and our daughter's children to look at our marriage as we did our grandparents. We want to create memories and let them know that you will have your problems in marriage but try to work it out.
I know sometimes things cannot be worked out. Sometimes people are hurt beyond repair, and at that point, it is sometimes best for everyone to walk away. I just believe that people often get divorced for stupid things that can be prevented. Just take the time to think, talk, laugh, and cry. It helps, and I hope that this little blog has maybe helped someone. Take care until the next one.

Great Weekend

Hello readers,

this weekend was great. A lot of people canceled their weekend plans because they believed the evil meteorologists who want New Orleans to drown in oil just so they can have a story. I did not, however. I saw right through their scheme, and my family and I made a trip to the aquarium. Leah had so much fun, and she hugging us and saying, "Thank you my momma," and, "Thank you my dada." Her reaction made the risk worth it. She screamed when she saw the fish swimming over our heads. At one part, a barb stared at Leah and swam towards her like she was his next snack. It was too funny.
After the aquarium, we took a short stroll down the Riverwalk. We did not get to do this long because it was starting to rain. We did not want to get too far away from the car and get drenched.
When we arrived back home, we went to Southside's. We love it there. I had a tasty chicken salad sandwich with sweet potato fries, and Aaron had chicken fried steak with french onion soup and fries. Leah ate off our plates because she has become a very finiky eater. We all left with our bellies full and a little leftover. Success!
Sunday, Aaron and I deemed pajama day. We watched TV while Leah played at her art desk that my parents got her for her birthday. Aaron eventually went out and got cookie dough for some cookies and milk. It was so yummy. I loved today and yesterday.
These are the types of memories that I will have with me for the rest of my life, and hopefully, Leah will one day. Next weekend will be full of family fun since we will be spending it with Aaron's family. We be celebrating Leah's birthday again since they were not able to do so this week. I cannot wait. I am going to attempt to make a Spongebob cake since he and fairies are the new it. Do not get me wrong, we still love our Mickey, but we have now moved forwarded with a few more. Anyways, I am going to dash off. I hope you all have a wonderful week, and I will keep posting as things happen.

Blogging Again

So hello blogging world! It is has been quite awhile since I last blogged, and since then, a lot has happened. For starters, Leah is two today! Yes, two! She is my little pig-tailed monster, and I love her so, so much. The moments that mean the most to me and mean the world to me are the ones when she looks at me and says, "I love you my momma." She has quite the personality. She is brilliant. We were worried for awhile because my nephew has autism, and she started developing slowly. It turned out, however, she needed tubes. Her ears have not developed enough on their own, so the doctor put some tubes in. She has taken off since. She is the most amazing, little thing in our lives. She loves everything, even daycare. Yes, she is in daycare now; but she thrives when learning. I had to put her in daycare because I got a job. Finally!
I have actually had my job for a year now. I work at a bank. I started off as a teller, but I have recently got promoted to the home office. I will be working in the deposit service department where I handle bookkeeping and paperwork. It is a better schedule than a teller. It is 8a-5p, and I will have the weekends off. I love my job, and I love the people I work with. Aaron is thrilled that I found a job I enjoy doing.
He is doing very well by the way. He has a new job also, but again, it is not new to him. He is working for Hobby Lobby and is working as the Co-manager. They are looking to give him a store after the holidays. He wants it so bad, so we are all keeping our fingers crossed for him. We both love Hobby Lobby because he is home more often. He also gets every other weekend and Sundays off. It is nice to be able to spend time together again. He is definitely my best friend, and I have missed him.
I could keep going because as I said, tons have happened. I think I will end here, however. It is better sometimes to just go with the flow and to leave the readers wondering. Hopefully, I will be posting more. Keep touch kiddos.